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9:45 a.m. - 2003-04-30 I have reached the dip of the latest rollercoaster. My lone carriage is trying to get up the incline but it keeps sliding back down again. I feel sick, not through food, but through nerves, through thinking I am screwing everything up. I didn't so much get a bollocking at work yesterday, but I had made a fuck up and that bit at the bottom of my stomach did a full Olympic gymnast back flip and the one of my two bosses who is an arsehole told me to look both ways before crossing the road and to use my brain and I'm just a little bit too delicate for comments like that at the moment. Today I have a joyous monthly meeting to sit through, so if I don't post again you know I've lost the will to live altogether.
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